#29 The Confectioner's Disasteroid

Age: 45 Years

Hidden or Lost?: Abandoned In Orbit of Mars

History: Seen as a goofy relic of a simpler age, the candymancing supervillain known as The Confectioner has long since hung up his Hat of Many Stripes and faded into super obscurity. But on a clear night, his greatest creation, the orbital crime lair known as The Disasteroid, can still be seen in the orbit of Mars.

A giant asteroid made of a deep violet rock candy, The Confectioner created The Disasteroid in the late 1970s to serve as his dastardly headquarters, far from the meddling heroes who always soured his sweet schemes. Using his unique talent for candy-based sorcery, he manifested the superstructure in secret and mined out a network of chambers for his work. Among the twisting tunnels, he made a library for his Gummy Grimoires where he could store and record the secrets of his sucre sorcery. There was a training area for his henchmen to spar with the animated Truffle Toughs he summoned. There was a hanger for his signature vehicles like the Peppermint Charger and the Hard Candy Helicopter. Access to the Disasteroid required the use of some specially enchanted rocket pops, which would blast off whoever ate one right to the rock.

Unfortunately, by the time The Confectioner had completed his Disasteroid, the world of heroes and villains changed. It had become harder, and in his opinion, tasteless. His inaugural scheme launched from the new base was an attempt to ransom The Sphinx by turning the landmark into chocolate, leaving it to melt under the heat of the Egyptian sun. But The Confectioner’s archenemy, Citizen Quo, who had recently received a power boost from a grim set of gritty circumstances, simply mocked the villain’s plan before throwing the Disasteroid at Mars, where it has orbited ever since. The sweet retreat was abandoned before anyone even got a taste of its power.

After this humiliating defeat, The Confectioner was sent to prison. By the time he was depowered and released, he knew there was no more room in the modern world for his candy-colored criminality. However he still looks up at the stars, using a telescope to spot his derelict headquarters. And he laughs. Because he alone knows the Disasteroid’s greatest secret: it’s powered by The Philosopher’s Stone, the most powerful magic object in existence.

Each time he sees the Disasteroid, his laughter grows sweeter.

1. Sweet and Sour Satellite Array

2. Hard Candy Throne

3. Caramel Control Crystals

4. The Gummy Grimoires

5. Licorice Laboratory

6. Honeycomb Hex Chamber

7. Torture Chamber

8. Confectioner’s Quarters

9. Bubblegum Gaol

10. Malicious Milk Whirlpool

11. Truffle Tough Factory

12. Saltwater Taffy Hanger

13. Mint Laser Banks

14. Violet Vault

15. Jellybomb Stockpile

16. Philosopher’s Heart